Dating – Part 1

My school days were spend fighting with boys and trying to everything a boy could do . Starting from going to the supermarket, learning how to rid a cycle and even wearing my dad’s over-sized t-shirts to tuition classes and never to forget the fights. This, obviously, got me into constant trouble at school. My dad always wanted a son, to take on his “what-ever” …. So when the fights escalated, my parents dumped me in a girls-only school. It was funny watching this breed of kids. There was mainly 3 categories. (1) who forgot how to speak when a boy was present (2) who was too busy making him “their” friend/boyfriend (3) the neutral ones. Being in a mixed school till 8th grade, I was obviously a category 3. Nevertheless, city kids were rude. That’s a story for another blog.

My college days were busy spend on learning things the “Indian” way. I was so engrossed in that process, I didn’t understand love even when I stumbled into it. Though the way out was quite epic . Again ! that’s another story. So basically, I haven’t understood what dating was till I left college(dropped out of college). Till then my idea of dating was: boy and girl speaks on phone and meeting up for coffee, if they clicked (no idea how, nor aware of the signs and symptoms) then they went forward (no idea of destination either), then they broke up. And they never discussed the reasons.. but kept throwing daggers at each other, or treated each other as if the dating period never happened …

Stop looking at me! I have no freaking idea how they did that.

Meanwhile, I got back to UAE, did a diploma. Got married. Got separated. Got another job. Got divorced . Got a better job and finally got to try standing on my own. Well, dad still takes care of me, coz I have some more hurdles before I can fly solo. So, finally I wanted to know what love is. How would it feel to have someone who could love you. Maybe call u cupcake or honey or whatever they want to call. I wanted to know why people fell in love, how they stayed in love and what’s so special about it… I wanted to know, how did butterflies flutter inside u when u see that someone special ..

So what do I do ?? Since my social interaction to humans are quite limited. All thanks to my work timings ((which is Sat – Thu : 9am-1pm / 4pm-10pm ** Fridays : 5pm-10pm)). So I try out tinder and ok-cupid. Met a few people, but seriously, no butterfly, no dragonfly, not even a house fly . No slow motion breezes and no understanding each other. Maybe since they find me a bookworm (no idea why) they keep in touch for a period of 1 month before popping the big question. “How about having sex? We know each other quite well” … leaving me stunned and mostly never replying back.

And I’m horrified … what happened to coffee ?? dinner ?? cute calls ?? calling each other stupid names like honey, cutie, babe, etc ?? what happened to “I love you”?? what happened to a kiss in the forehead ?? what happened to … … … .. ??

So now my current job is trying to learn what the new dating is … its quite messy and laced with sex. But I still got a long way to go. Thanks to my divorce, physical closeness to humans beyond a limit leaves me cold. 5 months of marriage, and I’m quite damaged. I don’t understand time pass affairs and long-standing affairs where they eventually get married to someone else at the end of the year-long saga’s …

So, I’m now going to find some similarly damaged soul, and try to mend my ways and update myself with the latest madness …

But I do enjoy being given a music CD, or a self-made meal… something simple, something genuine, something from the beautiful depths of your heart…

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4 thoughts on “Dating – Part 1

  1. Moving forward after a divorce is difficult. I found it daunting after 28 years of marriage to go on that first date. The thought of getting married again is also quite difficult to imagine. Based on my experience, eHarmony is the best way to meet other people. Costs more and requires time to build a profile but it does a good job of matching people similar to the Briggs & Meyer personality inventory. Hope you are successful in finding someone who will treat you well.

    Liked by 1 person

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